Sunday, September 29, 2013
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
The Tale of Toya and Dalton: A Million Years to Say
The Tale of Toya and Dalton: A Million Years to Say
December 2013
Normally I didn’t mind working graduation even if they were a little sad. I watched as my classmates some of which had become dear, dear friends walked across the stage in the glorified black gowns decorated with sashes that indicated the accomplishments. I would fell a ping of dread but an overall proud feeling. However not this time, this time was most definitely different. I stood by the door handing out announcements and smiling at the parents and faculty. I smiled at them and made pleasantries all the while I wanted to vomit. There only a few moments left and he’d be gone. I felt my eyes start to water. It was my fault I shouldn’t have let myself get so attached. However, his clear blue eyes and perfect smile stole my heart the first time he glanced in my direction. I still remember the first time we’d spoken and how I could barely make eye contact with him. I was in awe the God had made someone as beautiful as him.
“Toya, did you hear me?” Josie waved her hand in my face and awakened me from my drab thoughts.
“Yeah?”
“Did you want me to take over so you can step inside?” She asked as she reached for my announcements. Apparently it wasn’t a question. I crept inside just as they were starting the processional. I loved this part everyone seemed so full of pride, hope and promise. I smiled as I watched Andrew throw both his hands in the air as he walked off the stage. God that boy was goofy. Time seemed to be flying by there was only three more people before they got to him. I watched as he stood in line he didn’t seem nervous at all. The look in his eyes let me know that he’d kind of drifted into another world and wasn’t fully cognitive of the situation.
“Dalton Edwards,” They called his name and he stepped onto the stage he strolled toward the announcer with his normal confident swagger and then hit him with one of his award winning smile. He peered out into the crowd after shaking everyone’s hand and I swear for a split second our eyes locked. It was too much. I couldn’t believe that he was just going to walk out of my life and not know. I left the auditorium and decided to see if I could help elsewhere.
After the graduation was over some of the students were lingering around with their parents and I was cleaned up. Dalton and Andrew just happened to be two of the students that didn’t know how to leave. I went up to Andrew and gave him a big hug. “Congrats Drew don’t get too crazy tonight!” He squeezed me tighter. I liked the way it felt. It made me think that I mattered to him. Dalton was standing right across from him and his girlfriend Nikki was had her arms securely wrapped around his waist. I knew it would seem rude if I didn’t say anything but it hurt for me to even look in his direction. Every time I saw him with her it reminded me of how badly I’d screwed up. He’d been single for months and I never to the opportunity to let him know.
“Hi Toya,” he said dryly and I glanced at him.
“Oh Dalton I didn’t even know you were here,” I retorted. I kicked myself for it. Why couldn’t I just be nice?
“What was that? Congratulations … oh thank you Toya you’re too kind,” he narrowed his blue eyes at me but gave me that look that confirmed that I was most definitely a straight female. I rolled my eyes.
“It’s like way past time for you to leave Dalt, I’m sure you have other places to be.” I placed my hands on my hips all the while I’m screaming inside. Why do I keep pushing you away? I want you to stay!
“I don’t have to take this!” He smirked at me before him and his crew left the Monroe Center.
Everything was cleaned up and I was finally getting ready to leave when Dalton came barging through the double doors. He was wearing a frown which unlike him.
“Hey.”
“Hey, have you seen my phone?”
“Actually, I think someone turned one in,” I said I was actually happy to be useful to him. I went and retrieve the phone from the box and handed it to him. This was it my very last opportunity to say something to let him know. He’d told me that he was going home with his parents tomorrow and then I would be left to deal with my regret for the rest of my life.
“Congratulation Dalton, I really am happy for you,” I forced out the words it was so weird to actually be nice to him. Normally I was always picking and bothersome but that was only because I didn’t know any other way to relate.
“Thanks,” he said dryly. Part of me wanted to stop there and end on a fairly decent note. He turned to walk away from me and I searched my brain for something to say.
“I’m sorry that I’m always … I mean, I … I really valued your friendship Dalt, even though I didn’t always act like I did.” He turned to me and studied the expression on my face; his lips slowly rose into a smile.
“Toya, you never acted like you wanted me to bother you or be around you for that matter.”
“I know … it’s just the only way I knew how … to uh, umm … to relate to you.” I fumbled because I didn’t know what else to say.
“You always seemed to know how to relate with everybody else. What was it about me that made you feel as though you couldn’t relate to me?” He stepped closer and I stepped back. “I’ve been nothing but cordial to you, haven’t I?”
“Yeah, it’s just … I” I felt defeated I couldn’t find the words. I felt they’d forever be stuck in my throat and this moment would be etched in my mind as the worst punk out of my life. I turned my back to him and grabbed my purple peacoat. “Never mind Dalt, you better go you don’t want to leave Nikki waiting,” I said as I fumbled to put my coat on. I felt to hands behind me assisting me in my endeavor.
“Finish it Toya. What were you trying to say?” He rested his hands on my shoulders and my whole body froze. “I think I know what you were going to say.”
“Then why make me say it? You want to embarrass me don’t you?” I mumbled.
“No, I just … I thought it might be nice to hear what you really feel about me for a change.” He turned me around so he could look in his eyes. God, his eyes were so perfect … he whole face for that matter looked like it had be damned near craved from heaven.
“I have feelings … I care about you Dalt,” I said at a whimper and a whisper. I waited for him to reject me or to laugh but what he did next would make this day the very best day of my life. He cradled my face in his hands and kissed me. It was slow, sweet, and passionate everything I thought a kiss from Dalton would feel like.
“See that wasn’t so hard was it?” He breathed and then kissed my nose.
“No, it just took me a million years to say,” I chuckled and he kissed me again.
Monday, September 23, 2013
Jeremih - I Like *Lyrics* [Feat. Ludacris]
This is the song that I had Teddy sing to Tam while they were getting busy ... well part of it anyway lol. Just thought I'd share :-)
Friday, September 20, 2013
Remembering Leah Teaser
Introduction
No one really had any love for the female wolf. They found her to be a bitter “drag” to be around. So they left her in her hell to mourn the life she should have had. Should have had Sam but fate deemed her cousin a better wife for him. Her father should be alive but fate took him away from her far too soon.
She constantly felt she had to prove herself that’s what made her take on the last newborn during battle. Only one wolf tried to help her, Jacob, but he was too late. The sad thing was that even though Jacob tried to save Leah, his actions were more to spare Sue the hurt; it wasn’t because he remotely liked Leah at all. So when he saw the newborn crushed her cranium against a boulder and rendered her unconscious, he like most of the others were shocked but indifferent in regards to her well being. Leah’s body instantly went back to its human form and Emmett and Rosalie finished off the newborn. Alice covered the female shifters body and tried to revive her. Nothing, I heard nothing from her thoughts. I only saw blackness. We all would have thought she was dead if it wasn’t for her heartbeat. That faint little thumb that was so weak that I was sure she was giving up.
“The Volturi, she needs to be removed before their arrival. I will come to her after we are finished,” Carlisle said in hushed and rushed tones before rejoining with Esme to address Aro.
The pack removed her …
Chapter 1: Comatose
Sue leaned over her daughter crying. “Oh God what happened?” Sue cried, “Who is responsible for this!” Carlisle brought me along with him to see if there was any mental activity going on inside of her, but right now Leah Clearwater’s mind remained a lifeless tomb. The whole pack stood around her.
“She should have listened.” Sam said quietly. He forced himself to feel no regret but in the back of his mind he remembered laughing and chasing Leah in a sundress up a hill when they were younger. He had loved her and part of him remembered that love, but he felt to acknowledge that feeling for Leah would be disrespect for her current fiancée. “Always so stubborn,” I felt the tension and ache in his throat as he masked his concern for the sake of his new fiancé. I looked on Leah’s face she seemed at peace, it wasn’t as if she was dreaming, or more appropriately it seemed like her slate had been wiped clean.
“All of that doesn’t matter now. All that matters is that my sister wakes up.” Seth stood by the doors frame while all of this transpired. He was the one person that felt the appropriate hurt. He felt like he was quickly losing everyone that he loved. Leah had never been the bitter bitch to him that all of his pack makes saw her as. She was a warm a protective sister.
“That’s what I’m working on.” Carlisle looked at me and I shook my head, there was nothing going on upstairs. He sighed and covered Leah with the blanket and asked everyone to exit the room. Everyone looked at my father waiting for a response. “I don’t know what information I can give you. She’s in a coma … the bump on her head should be healed by morning. However, that doesn’t guarantee that she will awaken by then.” Her mother began to cry. Emily tried to comfort her but she really wasn’t having it. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed that my Bella had pulled Jacob to the side and was talking to him. My skin boiled, I couldn’t believe that she was pissed at me because I let it be known that we planned to be married. Her focus seemed to be on comforting him but his focus was on what was going on with Leah. Now that Jacob knew that Leah could die he was concerned, he had known her since he was little. It would be odd to not have her around. He knew from now on he would be happy to have the harpy be a nag around him.
“How long could she be out of it like this,” Sue looked up at Carlisle looked pleadingly.
“Comas could last a couple days, weeks, months …” Then we saw her inch her way into the living room. She held the wall with one hand and her head with the other. She looked around the room wide eyed and alarmed.
“Oh my God Leah you had us all worried sick!” Her mother rushed to her and embraced her and Leah flinched away she looked at her mother as if she were somebody foreign. Actually she was looking at everyone and everything that way.
“Leah who is hugging you right now?” I asked and Sue looked at her at me confused and then looked back at her daughter.
“My … mom?” Sue smiled; she didn’t realize that Leah was asking not answering the question. She searched both Sue and my expression for validity or her deduction.
“Do you know your last name?” I asked and everybody started to catch on. I heard someone in the background gasp and Emily say oh no. Leah looked around embarrassed by her lack of familiarity and then tears welled up and then ran down her cheeks as she shook her head. Carlisle stood in front of her trying to block everybody in the room, so that their stares and presence wasn’t so overwhelming. “Tell me what going on in your head Leah.”
“I’m confused and scared … I didn’t know my first name before she … my mom … said it.” She sighed. “My head hurts really badly.”
“You should probably lay back down and rest.” Carlisle tried to escort her back to the room so she could have the quiet she needed to remember everything.
“But …,” she stalled, “I really wanted to see my face.” He smiled sadly at her. He gave her pity and empathy because that’s what she needed.
“Of course young one,” he took her to mirror in the living room beside the front door and she looked at herself mesmerized.
“That’s me … Leah.” She sighed deeply and another tear rolled down her face. I think she hoped actually seeing her face would bring back some memories of something but she didn’t receive anything not for lack of trying. She continued to stare in silence and with a shaky hand touched some of the features of her face. I look a lot older than I feel, she thought.
“You don’t want to strain for memories Leah, they will come naturally, I promise to do everything I can to help you.” Carlisle placed his hand on her shoulder and she embraced him. It was the first time I’d ever witnessed Leah actually be nice to one of our kind and think on them with positivity.
“I really hope you can.” She said between sobs as she continued to cling to him.
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Awakening The Elements Teaser
Based Loosely off of The Heart At It’s Darkest by ChemicalJane
It had been over two years …
Since I had left my home in hopes of finding new happiness … well maybe not happiness, but a new purpose. I found many things but I don’t know if it was my purpose in life, but it was most definitely a new perspective. Two years since I had fully embraced what I was, two years of almost completely living like a human. The main reason I was coming back was because I had decided that I was okay was what I was, I even lived for certain parts of it. Two years had past and my secret or better yet our secret should be a memory in everyone’s minds.
I had to come back because if I didn’t I feared I would lose myself and more importantly my ability to phase, each time I tried it was harder to get that burning ripple to flow underneath my skin and give way to my inner animal. The last time I tried I stood for a good hour in an unknown forest trying to invoke enough of an emotion to trigger and angry response in my body, but I couldn’t think of anything I was truly angry about. I was not the same Leah, I wasn’t bitter and everything I seemed to bitter about before seemed like a distant memory. After traveling the world, seeing major destruction and learning of so many natural disasters it made all of my emotional baggage petty at best.
Now, I sat in the taxi in front of my home in Forks, I watched as someone peeked through the blinds curiously. I hadn’t told them I was coming home I wanted to surprise everyone, plus I knew if I told them I was coming home they would ask me a question I still didn’t have the answer to … How long was I staying? I kept telling myself that I would stay long enough to get my ability to phase comfortably back then I would leave. Staying here would serve me no good, but something told me that I was lying to myself and that I was in for a rude awakening if I thought I was just going to walk back into my old life and no drama would befall me. I sighed deeply and handed the driver a hundred dollars.
“Thanks” I stepped out into my front yard and adjusted my clothes a bit.
“No way!” I heard Seth yell from the house, “Mom, Leah’s back, Leah’s back!” Seth whipped opened the door and ran towards me scooping me up in a big hug and squeezing me until I was almost breathless. “Leah God I missed you!”
“I missed you too!” I gasped as he let me down. He grabbed one of my bags and helped me in side. Once in our living room I sat on the couch and take a deep whiff expecting to smell all of the memories of home but instead, my eyes widen with excitement and horror. I immediately stood up and headed for the front door, this was a mistake. It had to be because if it weren’t I wouldn’t be getting ready to face this right now. I haven’t even had the time to get comfortable being home. I wasn’t going to deal with the situation just not now.
“Where are you going Leah?” He laughed, “You looked scared to death!” He now sat were I was once located on the couch.
“Fresh air,” I murmured. I needed to escape before they all approached me, it would be too much.
“Can’t you wait until you see mom she has missed you like crazy!”
“You’re right … I’ll stay.” I sat in the chair by the door, just in case I needed to make a run for but I really did want to see mom. “Where is mom anyway?”
“She is upstairs, she was getting dressed,” he shrugged, “some things take her the longest time.”
“Yeah …” Then, murmuring came from the back door, through the kitchen, and now appeared to me in the form of Jacob, Bella, Edward, and little Renesmee (who looked to be about 10 years old).
“Leah!!” Jacob grabbed and shook me senseless. “Welcome back Beta! You are back right?”
“I” I was about to give him an excuse but he really didn’t seem to care about what I had to say.
“You look hot by the way; it has been a million years since I have seen you with long hair and what up with it being all curly.” He went to run his fingers through it and Bella cleared her throat, she never did like any of the attention Jacob gave me, especially once he imprinted on her little … . Look at me I was getting ready to go back into my old ways of thinking maybe it was the bitterness that gave me ability to phase so quickly, maybe that was what I was missing.
“Jacob,” I moved his hand from my hair, “its just hair, God.” I smoothed my hands over my jeans and took a seat. We all sat in silence momentarily.
“So what brings you back?” Bella said not looking at me with her voice cold.
“I missed my family …” I thought better of mentioning my other dilemma. Edward’s eyes now frowned at me, and I immediately remembered his ability to steal my thoughts.
“Oh … will you be staying long?” She asked concerned, everything in the room seemed smaller. I knew Bella and I had a public disliking for each other but this was different, her glare had purpose. I was trying to be cordial but Bella always agitated me, she sort had this way of claiming things that didn’t belong to her.
“This is my home … it was my home first, I am allowed to stay Bella … if I want.” I said matter of fact, sometimes I honestly thought she believed that everything revolved around her, but honestly after two years to view the world I could easily tell her that it didn’t, the world revolved around none of us. It was just ball of space in which we all existed.
“Do you want to?” She raised her eyebrow to me and I rolled my eyes in response. I could smell my mother’s scent increasing rapidly throughout the room.
“Leah dear! Oh honey you are as beautiful as the sun and stars combined … traveling has brought out the best in you!” She hugged me, she was right traveling had brought out the best in me, but something was missing.
“Thanks mom and you look great too!”
“Well I have to; you know what tonight is don’t you?” She smiled at me and I thought to the calendar I could think of nothing special about April 3rd.
“Leah it is the biggest counsel meeting of the season, you know that!” She popped me lightly on the head, “you should come a lot of the elders have been asking about you!” She beamed.
“Sure,” I said sitting down again. I didn’t want start an argument within my first few minutes of speaking of to her. Those meeting were so boring or at least I used to think so, when I was nine, which was the last time I had ever attended one.
“Well tell me about everything you’ve seen and all the things you have done.” She sat down anxiously waiting for me to say something profound.
“Haven’t you gotten any of my letters?” I questioned, knowing that I had fully detailed all of my adventures to her, Seth, and Jacob and no one else.
“Yeah, but Leah I just want to hear your voice.” So I told her a couple of stories about some of the people I met.
“I’ve been meaning to ask you honey, what made your destinations change drastically?” I stretched I hadn’t talked this long for a while, as I raised my arms to the sky and arched my back I noticed to undeserving eyes fall across my body, hopefully I was the only one to notice. Why must he examine me so, as if he were hungry for something? It made me uncomfortable it made me remember who I was then, a monster. That is not me not anymore. I felt like the past was chasing me and I was running straight into a brick wall.
“What do you mean?” I cleared my throat in a desperately lame attempt to breathe with the uncomfortable tension in the room.
“I mean at first you went to places like Paris and Italy, you made them sound so beautiful and glamorous. Then your stops seemed to have a purpose, like when you went to South America and then Africa and the whole dynamic of your letters changed … I could tell that you had too.” I smiled at her.
“Yeah, I left the bitch in Rome and haven’t seen her since.” I smiled slightly. “I have to admit there are some things I regret saying and doing when I was the bitch but I cannot change that I can only go forward and try to be humane … even if I’m not completely human.” I sighed.
“You are …” Edward said quietly from beside Bella she now glared at him, her looked advised him to chose his words wisely, “human.”
“And don’t say bitch sweetheart it’s not lady like!” I laughed mom said bitch. Edward smirked too. It was funny that she would say a word that she claimed to be unclean and not lady like, did she not consider herself a lady. It was one of the random slips she made that I let slide.
“I want to help people all over the world, it gives me the most amazing feeling knowing that I am touching someone’s life …in a good way, a way worth remembering. I don’t want to be the cause of pain.” I laughed, “This conversation is getting a little deep for my whole three hours of being home. I’m going to go freshen up … it was nice seeing you all.” I said politely
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Fanfiction is Busted: Black and Grey Spoiler
Since Fanfiction.com is down for right. I want to treat everyone who is reading Black and Grey 2 to a little spoiler. Disclaimer: I don't own the Fifty Shades Trilogy and this is for people 18++
Chapter Five: Candy and Crossed Legs
Royal Theatres Cinema 10:10PM
Death Sentence 4 was true to form one of the goriest movies that Tam had ever seen. It amazed her that Ted still thought these types of movies were awesome. She’d seen the rest of the Death Sentence movies with him it was only fitting that she see the last of the series even if she had her eyes closed through most of it. Tam loved going to the movies mainly for all the junk you got to eat when you went. She loved the neon sour worms. She loved to suck the sour off them until they were regular gummies. She watched the as the girl went screaming through the woods she was heading straight toward the abandoned warehouse exactly where the villain does all his killing. Tam shook her head as she chastised the character. Why did they always run into the woods? No one can help them if they are out in the middle of nowhere.
“I wish you would eat it already,” Teddy whispered as he took her box of gummy worms away. “You’re too old to be playing with your food.”
“You should be watching the movie instead of concerning yourself with what I’m putting my mouth,” Tam whispered and just to be a smart ass she continued to play with the gummy longer than she normally would have. Ted narrowed his eyes at her, this time she was this time she was trying to get under his skin.
“Hmmm hmmm yummy,” Tam said in a play voice as she finally decided to chew and swallow.
“Glad you’re enjoying yourself,” Ted said dryly as went back to watching the movie and Tam snickered to herself. She noticed that Ted tried to discretely reposition himself in his pants. She could still see the swell and for some reason just knowing that he felt way affected her too. She wasn’t happy about it; she felt it was proof that no matter how “normal” or platonic they tried to behave there was still this energy between them that wouldn’t go away. She shifted away from the armrest they were sharing and focused on the movie since Ted had taken her candy.
“Here if it means that much to you,” Ted said as he handed her candy back. He thought he’d made her made but it wasn’t him it was the situation in general. Tam didn’t want to be here she wanted to be locked away somewhere with him naked under covers but due to recent events she didn’t think it was possible.
“Thanks,” Tam said dryly as she took the candy box. After a few minutes Ted scooted over closer to Tam’s seat.
“Lean over this way so we can share,” he order and she obliged him. She actually gotten back into the movie and wasn’t really thinking about her proximity to him.
“Oh shit!” Tam jumped her seat as the villain smashed some guy’s head in with a sledge hammer. She nudged Ted. “That’s too much … ugh!” She shivered and then shielded her eyes laying her head on Ted’s shoulder. “Tell me when it’s over!” Ted chuckled now this was familiar Tam has always been squeamish at the sight of blood and guts and he always thought it was funny how she reacted. That’s why he brought her to these things for a good laugh.
“It’s over,” he whispered and Tam looked up at him. He was really, really close and his lips they were so close she wanted to taste them and she knew she couldn’t possibly be doing a good job of masking that emotion. She was thankful for the dark maybe it kept her secret. She went to shift away but Teddy wrapped his arm around her shoulder. It was horrible and great at the same time. How was she supposed to cool down her hormones with him sitting so close and smelling as delicious as he did? What’s worst was he was using her thumb to caress her upper arm. Her whole body was tense she didn’t know how she was going to make it through the whole movie at this rate. Her heart was beating so fast and there seemed like there wasn’t enough air in the room.
“Can I have some?” Ted leaned towards her and whispered.
“Excuse me?” Tam sounded indignant and Ted arched his eyebrow at her.
“The candy?” Tam had forgotten that she was even holding the candy but had a firm grip on it. She handed Teddy the box.
“You can have the rest. I don’t want anymore.” Tam tried to swallow back her emotion but it was already too late. Her emotions and desire had created that dull yet undeniable ache between her legs. She was uncomfortable; she was too close and not close enough at the same time. She crossed her legs so she could press her thighs together and rotated her ankle slowly causing the contraction of her thigh muscles to help relieve some of her pressure. She discretely exhaled and tried to focus on the movie but her little trick that normally worked seemed to make the problem worst instead of better. She felt herself building toward that feeling and even though she wanted to stop herself she couldn’t. Self control was what she needed and she didn’t have not a single bit of it. To top things off they were showing a sex scene in the movie. The guy was behind his girl friend drilling her from behind. Normally this would be something that Tam closed her eyes on but her mind went to work. She wondered what that position felt like. She enjoyed the sound being made from the girl’s behind meeting her boyfriend’s pelvis.
“I know what you’re doing,” Teddy whispered and nuzzled his nose against her ear. Tam jumped and tried to move away from him but he gripped her tighter. “Naughty, naughty little Tam would you like some help?”
**** This is not the full chapter so if you want to know the ending you will have to read it on fanfiction.com (when I get the opportunity to post it!)
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